Moments Captured and Remembered
Where is God in all of This
Last night we finished reading the boy’s case files. Unfortunately, there was nothing that made me want to say “no” and nothing that made Cody want to say “yes”. Which basically means “no” because I know that I have to accept Cody’s feelings.
Of course, while my husband doesn’t feel like these kids are right from him, he feels awful for me. Last night as he was apologizing to me, I had a bit of a breakthrough that, at least for now, has brought me some more peace.
This isn’t his fault. And as I explained to him that he didn’t need to apologize to me, I explained that in the end, if this was truly God’s will he would make Cody feel differently so perhaps this isn’t God’s will. I’m not sure whether the talking brought the thought or the thought brought the words, but at that moment I made the realization that in some ways seems to make this a bit easier for me. As we talked, we wondered with hope that if it’s not meant to be for us hopefully God has even better parents out there for these two boys.
Through all of this, I can’t say that either of us has lost faith. We know he’s here, we know he’s got a plan for us, and we know he’s going to help us through this. And I write this, I’m reminded of that line in Chris Knight’s song that still continues to hold so true:
“We learned long ago that you don’t doubt the good Lord’s plans, but some things are hard to take Lord, we’re just trying to understand.” ~ Chris Knight, “Crooked Road”
Damn this Crooked Road.
Related posts:
- Selection!
- Raw And Tired
- Waiting while on a Rollercoaster Ride
- Stuck in a Nightmare, or at least a Very Bad Dream
- The Unknown: Contrasts In Unrest And Peace
One Response to “Where is God in all of This”
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Hi, I'm Amy. It's just my husband and I around our house and we're learning to enjoy the freedom that it brings. As much as I can be an analytical person, I also love to be creative. Most of all I try to enjoy and appreciate life. And so, I named this blog "Reflective Snapshots" to reflect on the moments in life to be captured and remembered. 2010 Project 365
Amy, I’ve been thinking and praying for you. i was just thinking the other day that each marriage has something in it that requires us to seek peace about. i have been praying for you and your dh…as i can’t imagine the roller coaster ride your emotions and feelings must be on with this.
hugs Amy